It's interesting being in the in-between, the time between my past life and my next.  no, memories and people don't go away, and yes, everything that has happened in my past has shaped who I am and shapes who I am becoming and who I will be, but at the same time there is a feeling of letting go... yet still hanging on.  It's hard.  I haven't really kept good contact with people and I've been lonely, and probably a little depressed.  I feel almost trapped in this house because I don't know that many people and I tend toward introvertish behaviors anyway.

I can't wait until the fall and leaving for Biola, but at the same time there is always an underlying fear.... because I always fear most what I do not know.  Biola will be a new experience for me... and will be the start of another part of my life.

I wish I could clear my thoughts, but I can't.  They are all jumbled in my head and I can't seem to sort them out.  I'm happy to be here rather than there -- there are so many things I love about here that I had forgotten about, but I miss the people.  I miss school and daily interactions with people I have known for years... with people that I grew up with.